He leaves his dirty work clothes in a pile in the living room every day and doesn’t pick it up. She never does the dishes so they are stacked to death in the kitchen sink. You can’t see his nightstand next to the bed but you know its there. She refuses to take all of her makeup off the bathroom counter. Many times all of that is an emotion one is feeling manifesting itself in clutter and mess. Some experts say that the state of a space is a representation of the people insides state of mind. I tend to agree.
I have had clients tell me the reason they don’t clean up is that the others doesn’t either! OR they keep getting on them about the mess, so nothing happens to spite them. Ugh I say nobody wins when that happens.So the simple answer isn’t to just clean it up. You need to clean up the relationship first. Is your relationship lacking? No sex? No affection? Do you constantly pick at each other?
Is it YOU?! Are you feeling inadequate about something? Depression? Sadness? Is it a weight issue? Self esteem? Are you hiding behind the clutter or in it?!
Either way have you just given up?! I invite you to come out of that. You aren’t living your best life. You are doing yourself and your partner a disservice. Before you tackle the dishes in the sink and dirty clothes pile in the living room, start the process of working out your psychological stuff. Try to remind yourself the reason you are in your relationship and get back to a place of kindness and WORK. Go see a therapist, counselor, pastor,,,,
If you are reading this and was wondering why your partner was so messy, this could be a reason why.